random thoughts for april 27

i'm sitting in the airport as chris says goodbye to her group. this, more than anywhere else, is my work site. the airport. one group comes, another one leaves. it's hard to believe i've been doing this for over eight months. it's even harder to believe that in just over three months, i'll be gone. it's been a few weeks now since the shitstorm, a week the volunteers aptly named following a string of untimely events. among those events is the departure of another volunteer. since i've last written, there has been more changes within the volunteer community. eric and dre have both left, for very different reasons. but despite, or maybe inspite, of their departures, the eight who remain seem to be committed till the end. i never expected four people to leave early. none of us did. but life does not always go according to plan. things change. things will not go your way. but life goes on, so must we. that is the biggest piece of solidarity i can take away from my neighbors, from this experience. things routinely do not go according to plan for my neighbors. they are slighted, suffer injustice. but they go on. because that's life. when i look at where i live, the people i interact with on a daily basis, it doesn't hit me. i've never once been overcome by the sight of poverty. but as i go on throughout the year, its the things that start to accumulate that makes it real for me. the man around the corner being killed. the drug dealer across the street from semillas being shot and killed. segundo dying because he doesn't get the health care he needs. a mother hanging herself because she would rather be dead than have her husband throw her out on the street. francisca's brother being brutually murdered with a machete (the details i will spare). these are the stories that make the hellish existence of this place real for me. not a cane house, a dirty kid. this. as much as i've struggled with this experience at times throughout the past eight months, i am eternally happy that i am apart of it. i wouldn't trade it for anything. and as i look down the road and realize that i have to leave soon, i'm aprehensive. but that's something that i will deal with when the time comes.

on to other things...a few weeks ago all of the volunteers went to see maná in concert in guayaquil. it was without doubt, the largest concert i've ever been to. easily 25,000 screaming ecuadorians, all chanting and singing along to one of the biggest latino rock groups in the world. it was a blast. we waited in a line at least 2 km long for an hour and half just to get into the stadium, and once we were in, it was the site. a great night with the rest of the volunteers.

for a large part of the year i maintained the attitude that durán is a great place, with great people, but i don't have any real friends, or at least enought to return one day. but for the last month or so i've been slowly changing my mind about that. one of our guards, abrahan, who was recently promoted to head o security, has become the closest thing to a best friend i have down here. abrahan, who i'm sure i've already said is an eternal frat boy, lives across the street from our house with his girl friend jessenia. but with his promotion, he and i have been working and talking more, and i've really started to look at him as more than just our guard, but as a really good guy and friend. he's finishing the second floor of his house this spring, and supposedly he's going to teach me a few things about building houses, which i'm stoked to learn about. i'm also traveling with him in a few weekends to manabi, a province up the coast, to visit eduardo's family there (abrahan and eduardo are quasi-related). so who knows, i may just come back one day. i told abrahan that if is 40th birthday is anything like his 30th, i will be back for sure.

and the retreat group is about to leave, so must i. but stay tuned...